4 great ways to ask for more sex in a relationship. It is not a secret that sex is significant in most relationships. As Jeanette Winterson, a writer, said, “I write about sex because often it feels like the most important thing in the world”.
So, tending to each other sexual needs in a relationship is crucial. It is common for partners to have different sexual needs and sex drives in a relationship. One might want sex regularly, many rounds per night, while the other partner can do it occasionally.
Therefore, If you find yourself in this situation, meaning you are the one who needs more, you are the one who is unsatisfied with what you are sexually getting, you can ask for more;
it is customary to do so. As Dr. Ruth Westheimer, a sex therapist, said, “Never forget that you have every right to have a satisfying sex life.””. But you should have some creative ways to do it to avoid offending your partner.
These innovative methods will give you a higher chance of getting what you want and help prevent you from rubbing your partner the wrong way, putting them on the defensive. Your partner will still be comfortable.
You should address the issue, whether it is a new or a long-term relationship. Here are some approaches that will increase the likelihood of success when you ask for more sex. 4 great ways to ask for more sex in a relationship.
1# DO NOT TAKE IT PERSONALLY
4 great ways to ask for more sex in a relationship. Most couples face this issue in their relationships. Having a higher sex drive than your partner or Being in the mood for sex when your partner isn’t is common. It often results in being rejected more than accepted when asking for sex;
In this case, do not take it personally. People have low libido for different reasons, including hormonal issues, stress, and some medications.
So, look into the real reason for the problem and try to solve it. You must remind yourself that your partner’s less interest in sex may not be because of you.
However, taking it to heart and personally will create other issues that could eventually affect the relationship. You could miss out on a beautiful relationship because of a problem that could potentially be resolved if you tried.
Moreover, being understanding and exerting patience will significantly benefit the long run.
4 great ways to ask for more sex in a relationship. Here, communication is critical. Psychotherapist Rachel Sussman says, ”There’s a lot of research showing that couples who have better communication have better sex lives.”.
It would help if you let your partner know the issue. But do it diplomatically to avoid putting your partner on the defensive. Start by recognising all the positive things in your relationship, and praise your partner for their input.
You can go through your usual sex routine and tell your partner what you like in the performance, the specific things they do and that you want.
Please take the opportunity to ask them what they like, the things they would like you to do more. Doing so will help lay the foundation for you, telling them what you also want. Do not play the blaming game.
So, it is not smart putting all the blame on your partner, who can also argue that you are a sex maniac from their perspective. The conversation will turn into an argument, and the issue will remain unresolved.
3# MAKE YOUR DESIRES AND NEEDS TO BE KNOWN
4 great ways to ask for more sex in a relationship. Once you get your partner comfortable on the subject, time to slide into the conversation things about yourself, ask what your partner likes about your moves, and imply your willingness to do more. Clearly emphasise what you can give and what you want to receive.
Tell your partner details of what makes you satisfied and happy. Sex plays a vast and vital role in our lives, and it is essential to get what you want.
So, at this point, it is recommended to be straightforward, detailed about your needs, and take the opportunity to clarify everything.
Therefore, if there is a considerable gap between what you want and expect and what you are actually getting, assure your partner that you will gradually implement the changes.
4# TRY NEW THINGS
4 great ways to ask for more sex in a relationship. After the conversation with your partner, now is the time to implement what you both came up with. It is always best to start gradually. So, move forward with actions. Here are new approaches to spice up or increase your new life.
- Be cuddlier: Do not be stingy about affectionate gestures; do as much as possible. The more cuddles you give, the more cuddles you will receive. This is about hugs, kisses, and holding hands.
- Go back to basics: Show some romance if you are falling behind. Send romantic or naughty texts, flowers or chocolate, and take date night initiatives.
- Schedule: Make a plan with your partner about your sex life. Make some timetable for when you are having sex. You can start with only a few days and then gradually add more days. Take it easy.
- Change settings: If you are used to having sex only in the bedroom, why not try other settings? Such as the kitchen, the bathroom, in the car…? The choice is endless. Get creative.
- Watch porn together: if you are not doing so, try to introduce some pornography, especially those involving what you like. Get your partner accustomed to what you want them to do in bed.
Moreover, and do not forget to acknowledge and praise your partner for their efforts along the way.
4 great ways to ask for more sex in your relationship. Well, quite easily, talk it out and move forward with actions. The above recommendations include the following:
- not taking it personally,
- making your desires and needs to be known, and then
- trying out new things.
Do you have any other recommendations? Please do share in the comments box.